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april 16

i cant say the words “i love you” but i still know how it feels. all my feelings are there but i fear hearing myself say it out loud. no one tells me they love me. i am not loveable.
friends and family do, but no one is IN love with me. that is why i want to die. i am sick of trying. i will not change for anyone but this version of myself pushes people away. no one will ever know when i love them and no one loves me.
what a sad existence. so what do i do?
more crystal meth please.

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